Wednesday, 2 December 2009

Speech night and sleeping

You're going to have to excuse the erratic nature of this particular post - I am supremely bored right now, after having a rather entertaining day. Most sensibly, I would have a shower and go to sleep for an hour. Most likely, I will not do this. However, a shower is definitely in order - one cannot go an hour walking in the Adelaide Summer sun without needing a shower to refresh the body, mind and nostrils.

Met April's friend Renee today :) seems nice. I feel like such a baby though! Mind you, this was bound to happen when you hang out with someone almost two years your senior, who themselves had friends several years older.

Am excited for tomorrow - get to see D, methinks (in all honesty will be gutted if he doesn't show). Driving lesson (I really need to drive my own car - it's driving me nuts that I can't.) at 8.30am. Who on earth is awake at that time of the morning. It doesn't exist in my mind........ Having said that, I've been up before then most mornings (only exception is an 11.30 start last week) because my mind does this clever little thing whenever i am looking forward to something in the afternoon, and wakes up extra early, as if just to spite me and teach me a lesson in patience for being so excited about seeing people.

Speech night tonight. Blergh. Not looking forward to it, but I get my leaver's statement and some kinda award apparently. Am not happy with mr H for making me feel like an idiot in front of my entire cohort at rehersals at all! ! ! ! ! ! ! But it was made up for meeting up with April n Renee along with my own brood at pancake kitchen. Was yum yum, but too much for little old me. Will be having a savoury one next time, methinks.
I'm hungry just thinking about it. I want pasta. I hope we're having spaghetti bolognaise for dinner.

Saw pigeon sex today. Much laughing was had at the poor bird's expense (excuse that pun, right there). It was just plain funny to watch the courtship, the epic rejection, and her running away from him before finally giving in.... and it was over in like 2 seconds, no exaggeration!

I really really really want food. REALLY want it.

I woke up this morning, almost crying, like 4 times. I have no idea of the time, and the only reason I wasnt crying was because my eyes were glued shut (ew) It's actually making my eyes water just my thinking of it.
Because I have a very active mind, and an even more active imagination. This manifests itself by me having epic dreams. No, not the colloquialism, actual epic dreams. Terrifying, sometimes, but pretty large scale on the most part. Sleep talking, walking and general restlessness are also included in this. The latter three are usually only present when something is bothering my conscious mind. At the moment, it's the fact that i had to leave, yet again, the one person that I feel safe doing ANYTHING with. This includes stupid stunts in his mothers car, which should not feel as exhilarating as they do - it's so likely to end in an ambulance. But yes..... I promised I'd be home last night by 10 (I was 20 min late as it was), and this means leaving said boy behind. Makes me upset, cause just laying with my head on his chest puts me in a mood somewhere between supreme-contentedness and sleep. One closely following the other. And this feeling is specific to him. Nobody else. Ever. So, you can understand my reluctance to leave. With this playing on my mind, i went to sleep, and woke up in the middle of the night, certain that I had gone to sleep with him next to me, and he wasnt there. and i panicked, sat up, looking for him, felt between the sheets, as though, defying physics, he might be there. he wasnt. so, rather glumly, i just wrapped myself up in my quilt and went back to sleep.

Damn i wait for the day when this doesnt happen almost every night.

Shame this day is at least a month away................................. And that's if i'm lucky.


  1. A lot of this post made me feel upset.

    Nah, you weren't out of place, you're not as young as you think. Especially mentally, definitely not. And I'm relatively sure Renee liked you anyway.

    It was nice seeing you all random and spontaneous today. Made me look forward to Friday. Although we should speak to your mother about taking your car, as I'm honestly not sure my car can handle two long trips in one day lmao.

    I've uploaded the colour photo on facebook, if you wanna scab it when you get home :)

    Hope your speech/award night went well. Love you, ttyl xo

  2. Hmmm... I've been offline for a bit, at least in blogging terms...

    I like a couple of things about this post... I don't know whether it's referring to sleep as a mood, or the familiarity of hanging out with people a couple of years your senior, or... there's a lot to love, is what I'm saying.

    Anyway, the main point of my commenting is to let you know, like I promised, a piece of news you've been holding out for. I don't know if you already have it, but here goes:

    "Year 12 results are expected to be released during the week commencing 14 December. Office of the SACE Board will confirm this in a media release at the beginning of that week."

    Scary as hell.

    Anyway, seeya round, good luck with the next few weeks, and I'll check out your other posts in a sec. In case I don't see you, Merry Christmas! :D