Wednesday, 20 August 2008

My Nightmare

There are some things that petrify me more than anything else on this earth.
They are survivable, but life altering.

I am afraid of getting pregnant. Of what it means for me socially, physically, psychologically....
I am afraid of being pregnant and alone.... of not having a partner to lean on when it gets tough....
I am afraid of the choice i would have to make: to abort or not.
If it happened right now... i would abort. for two reasons: 1 - i am not old enough to be caring for a baby. 2. at this stage in my life, i would not be able to give my baby the best life that i can give.

I know i will have a baby some time. i want to have a baby when im a little older.... but when i see this daydream... there is either no partner or a man with brown hair, in a white shirt and a face i cannot see.

But until such time as i am over 23 and old enough to have a baby.... i am afraid of it.

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