Monday, 10 November 2008

Tonight's stream of consciousness

I'm writing this now because i dont want to do my homework. I really should, or else I'm going to have to pull and all-nighter towards the end og the week, just to catch up... and I hate all-nighters.
i used a word count on my blog last night.... im close to 21000 words. wow. i thought that was pretty good for 75 posts, over 6 months.
now my english teacher knows why my assignments are always a day or two late.
i think i'm going to print off my posts, and make a book outta them. theyre not really that valuable, theyre only my innermost thoughts.
i want to have something to show my kids, so they know what i was like at the age of 16.
this is it, i guess. this, and photos.
i think i'm afraid of being forgotten.
no, i know i am.
i need a jumper, my room's cold....
... thats better
i don't know. i'm just tired and worried, i guess. im not stressed, because that sticks me in the same catergory that i try to avoid when i can.
do i mumble when i talk?
do others have difficulty comprehending fast conversation?
life looks so different with a different mindset.
ever noticed the ants, running around like crazy? frantically wearching for food to store before the night comes?
its like that at school. and the night is exams. all i hear is 'stress, stress, stress'. i hate that word. i dont hate things, because it's such a strong term to use, but this word, i totally loathe. they did a study.... they got a group of year 12's to stop saying the word stress... and their stress levels actually dropped. its the same with how you can convince youreself that youre tired, or sick. i always said i was tired, and i was. i stopped saying it, and it got better. ugh.
i have to do work. i dont have what i need to do it. who cares? do it anyway.
goodbye mind. goodbye fun. hello english essay and chemistry and biology and japanese kanji and every other damned bit of work i have to do.

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