Tuesday 18 January 2011

It's a gnawing feeling in your stomach - the knowledge of wanting something you cannot have. And yet, you are sure that if you really wanted to chase after it, you would be successful. So why not?
Something holds you back - duty, is it? Apathy? The constant reminder that you could be forcing the situation, or creating one that shouldn't exist.........
And all it is, comes down to one look. One confusing look that you're not sure to take as neutral, affirmative, or politely humouring you - polite only because that is the nature of others towards you in this situation. You quiestion whether you see a flicker of something purely out of your own imagination, or is it actually there? The only way to discover this is to take the leap and risk embarrassment, which, when it comes down to it, isn't really worth it.
And with that nonconfirming look, memories flash by, faster and faster, until you shake your head to rid yourself of them, and the moment is lost. You distance yourself, retreat back into your own thoughts, and things return to the way they were, with silence and the occasional sideways glance, cheeky grin, and slap away of a hand or flying object directed at your head.
Such is the way of friends.

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